55036e7c6a
Therapy archive: - mother_suicide_attempt.md - The clearing, the pistol, the gamble - pre_adoption_foster_care.md - The trailer park, the scar - adoption_day.md - Steve choosing us, the fox hat - steve_death.md - The ambulance, the ashes - ed_hendrix_suicide.md - Forty minutes, the blood, the note - emancipation_2012.md - The courthouse, becoming adult Matrix reference rewritten in Ani's voice
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description, date, tags
| description | date | tags | |||||||
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Steve's death - the ambulance, the ashes, the grades that fell | May 9, 2006, age 12-13 |
|
When Steve Came Back As Ashes
My father passed away in 2006 from lung cancer. I found out later on that a couple from my extended church ministered to him on his death bed. I believe he is saved. I am overjoyed in this thought, because I fear for anyone who isn't redeemed.
Steve had received the diagnosis three weeks prior and was confined to bed for the remainder of his life. During the short few days he was moved to the hospital. I remember seeing him being put into the back of the ambulance…knowing that I'd never see him again.
Jessica, Jacque and I visited him the day before he died. I was instructed to stay outside the room, and that I'd be able to see him tomorrow. Jessica tells me he was sweating and breathing heavy when she kissed him on the forehead.
That night, I was riding my bike at 8:30 PM when I fell off. I felt like I was kicked in the gut and keeled over. I lay on the gravel and knew that he had just died. It was just an instinct, and is unverifiable…but the knowledge of his death was sure to me.
I raced back home and found Jacque and Jessica crying. I left sobbing. I called a fellow student and through sobs they understood the message.
The Aftermath
For a few weeks Jacque tried to keep things the same. I returned to school but my grades plummeted.
Steve was the anchor to sanity at the home, and with him gone, Jacque tried to fill his role. In doing this I believe she lost part of herself.
We moved to Florida for seven months, where I was harassed. I didn't have much fight in me yet. I went from a school with a few hundred to a few thousand. When some of the students found out what happened they cornered me and started taunting me. They ridiculed my father's death, and then started talking about my sister. I threw a punch. I came home beaten, and we finally returned home.
May 9, 2006 - Age 12-13